Hatfields and the McCoys

Tonight, was crazy! I have to say that I have been taken off guard, hit over the head with the ugly stick. What I mean by that is I have been doing so well with trying to heal from my best friend and I going separate ways. It has been hard but I have been really practicing what I preach. Tonight I feel a little down because I stepped into the shadow. I was right there with Annikan Skywalker when he walked to the dark side.

The Hatfields and the Mccoys are the famous two families that started as friends and ended as warring neighbors. Murders, accusations, and all forms of fear were present in their relationship at the end.

Lucy, you have some esplainin to do! A quick recap of the story about my relationship with my friend. My two kids and I were welcomed into my best friends family with open arms. I met her shortly after my separation with my husband. Her husband had left her the year prior. Their family was understanding and took us in. They invited us on family trips, they invited us to Sunday dinners, they embraced and loved us. My kids were grandkids to my friends parents, I was sister to her sisters. So that is the level of consideration to be had when hearing the situation.

Ok, so here is what happened tonight. My son had a soccer game at the local recreation center. For the last 3 weeks at the games my friend's sister has avoided us at the games. I have to be honest and say that I haven't minded. It has hurt my feelings but I would rather avoid them than have a confrontation. So as we walked into the gym her sister was walking out. So I took the path of least resistance and did an about face and turned to go around the court away from her.  She then yelled across the court "Hi Heather, Hi Kylie, Hi Danielle"  pretty loud so that me, my daughter, and my friend were taken aback. I'm disappointed in myself because I read her "hi's" as mocking. In my mind, she was making the point of saying hi so I wouldn't tell her sister she avoided us again. My daughter and Danielle had no problem turning around and saying "hi" really big back but I just threw my arm in the air and did a quick wave. But....tomorrow is another day to meet my goal of love.

Here is where I am disappointed in myself. I have been learning that nothing in the past even matters. We only have the time in the now. I should not have looked to her past behavior and assumed anything. It's about love, it's about love, right? I just feel bad that I didn't follow the advice from Marianne's book that says when someone chooses to withhold their love or has forgotten love, they've fallen asleep to who they are, our duty is to remain awake and love! She then says, "The perception of someones innocence is a choice we make, based not on our opinion of them, but on our knowledge of God."

I will love them as God does. We will not be the Hatfield and the McCoys.