Where is God? Why hast thou forsaken me?

In the book the "Continuous Atonement" by Brad Wilcox, he speaks about the moment where the Savior feels he has been left alone by God. In fact saying in essence, "Abba, Abba, why hast thou forsaken me." Then he explains his reasoning why he thinks this happened. I agree with the logic of Wilcox's thought process. He gives the illustration that a seminary teacher once asked the question, "what if Jesus failed? what if He sinned or wasn't perfect? was there a backup plan so we could return to Heavenly Father?" He then answers these questions quoting Elder Packer with a definite NO! There was only one plan. We each took the risk knowing the benefits and we trusted that the Savior would be perfect and make the perfect Atonement. So when Christ asks, "Abba, Abba, why hast thou forsaken me?" God knew that the Savior must finish the process because all of us depended on Him and His Atonement. We needed the Atonement to be complete, that the Savior needed to complete it with perfectness, so that we may return to the presence of our Heavenly Father. The takeaway here is, God did not forsake Him but let something greater be accomplished.

And we see this again with Moses. Wilcox explains..."Moses saw God and afterwords we learn that "God...withdrew His presence from Moses so that Moses could come to understand that his very life-energy and strength came from God and that without God he would be nothing. Moses fell to the earth for many hours and experienced the contrast of being without God's sustenance...The term nothing , in this context, does not mean worthless or valueless...Nothing in this case means powerless." So again, God did not forsake Moses, but temporarily withdrew so that something greater could be accomplished. Moses realized the partnership with the Lord.

And again, I see this with myself and my situation. Going through the trial I have been experiencing, I have felt a withdrawal of my God. However, let me state emphatically, that I am not the person my Savior or Moses was at the time of their withdrawals. I am not talking about the withdrawal of the spirit because of my actions, hurt, and sin. I am talking about the withdrawal of God so that He might bring about a greater good. There has been much fasting, prayer, and turning to God for a miracle or two through my process. There has been a pleading for comfort, relief, and solace. There has been a pleading for a reconciliation with my bff, there has been a pleading for the softening of hearts with everyone involved. And then there was the emptiness of answer to those pleadings. I have felt like crying out "my God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?" I have felt the pains of loneliness.

And despite knowing that God does this so that greater good can be accomplished, it sometimes doesn't make it any easier. It does however, sanctify us in the knowledge that He loves us so much that sometimes He will withdraw so we can be one with Him. As a mom, this is hard for any parent to watch. He doesn't want me to suffer like this, He doesn't want me alone, He doesn't want to withdraw, but He does it because He loves me more.