Agency, Repentance, Making Amends, Oh My! PT 2

As I was saying, so instead of focusing on whether my friend and her family choose to forgive us the way the Lord wants them to, it makes no difference.  My part of the equation is to repent. Fall down to my knees and pray and pray and pray. So how do we repent? Essentially, there are six steps to repentance.

• Feel Godly Sorrow (I am working on this, sometimes I feel more sorrow because of the consequences, I need to pray more to feel sorrow for my part in the hurt)
• Confess to God
• Ask for Forgiveness- (I've certainly tried to do this on several occasions)
• Rectify Problems Caused by the Sin or Make Amends- (in the case of my friend, they won't allow me to because her dad has given a directive to ignore me, so in my case, the best thing I can do is pray for my friend and give her the space needed, and I will find ways to serve her the rest of my life)
• Forsake Sin- (hate the sin, don't slip back into the pit)
• Receive Forgiveness- (As stated in FIH book, if you feel you can't forgive yourself, then more repentance is needed)

I have felt really bad that my friends family has made it difficult to rectify or make amends with my friend. They are in protection mode and I understand that. So I struggle with the definition of rectifying or making amends as it's stated here.

Rectify Problems Caused by the Sin(s)
"And if it be stolen from him, he shall make restitution unto the owner thereof." (Exodus 22:12)

• Make restitution by fixing any problems caused by your sin.
• Problems caused by sin include physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual damage.
• If you can't rectify the problem sincerely ask forgiveness of those wronged and try to find another way to show your change of heart.
• Restitution. We must restore as far as possible all that has been damaged by our actions, whether that is someone's property or someone's good reputation. Willing restitution shows the Lord that we will do all we can to repent.

Doing the steps above are required in my repentance process. Figuring out what that means to help my friend mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, is my quest since that is where my damage to her was caused.

I have been feeling like most of the falling out is my fault. However, my friend and I are equally to blame in the falling out of our friendship and it's been a big struggle of mine to hear what she has been saying to her family about me. To give her the benefit of the doubt, maybe she has told them what she did as well, but I received an email from her dad yesterday that completely blew me away. In the kindest tone ever, he tried to tell me what a lacking person I am. 

As I've often stated, I have felt like a screw up pretty much my entire life. From birth till now, some things I've forgiven myself and other things I have not, which shows me I have not completed the repentance process completely on some things. My goal this year is a simple one, become a servant and repent.

When we repent, it is not enough just to forsake sin; we must replace the empty space left by sin by living righteously. We need to refill our spiritual bucket by doing those things that invite the Spirit back into our lives. We need to recommit to living an obedient life, to forgiving others, to restoring damages, and to enduring faithfully to the end.